


under the sycamore trees

by ghostsarentreal



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Alternate Universe - Neighbors, Childhood Friends, Enemies to Friends to Lovers, Fluff and Angst, Gen, Growing Up Together, M/M, Single Parents, Well not really, intensive use of tree metaphors because this is who i am now, mild violence, more like "idiot children who hate each other to grown teenagers with more than 5 braincells", sorta canon compliant, yamaguchi punches a bitch so true him
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-11-04
Updated: 2020-12-11
Packaged: 2021-03-09 00:48:59
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 11,972
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27385975
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ghostsarentreal/pseuds/ghostsarentreal
Summary: Kei has known Yamaguchi his entire life. From an outsiders view, they were the closest of friends. They were inseparable. You could never see one without the other.Kei did not want this. He really just wants to strangle Yamaguchi with his tiny fists.At least the feeling's mutual.
Relationships: Tsukishima Kei & Yamaguchi Tadashi, Tsukishima Kei/Yamaguchi Tadashi
Comments: 58
Kudos: 121





	1. april 3rd, 2003

**Author's Note:**

> Everyone thank Reigh and I for being so salty about the fact that some saniyan on twitter was talking shit about Yamaguchi and Tsukishima and saying that they weren't actually friends/didn't like each other that we came up with this enitre au one night. This fic is for you, bitch. 
> 
> This is supposed to be a progression of their friendship as they grow up, so it starts off with them being like, six, and THEN it actually gets interesting. Bear with me here. I'm hoping this is the first multichapter fic I actually finish. 
> 
> OH, and 10 chapters is a rough estimate. That's what my outline says, at least.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Everyone thank Reigh and I for being so salty about the fact that some saniyan on twitter was talking shit about Yamaguchi and Tsukishima and saying that they weren't actually friends/didn't like each other that we came up with this enitre au one night. This fic is for you, bitch. 
> 
> This is supposed to be a progression of their friendship as they grow up, so it starts off with them being like, six, and THEN it actually gets interesting. Bear with me here. I'm hoping this is the first multichapter fic I actually finish. 
> 
> OH, and 10 chapters is a rough estimate. That's what my outline says, at least.

The unusual friendship between Tsukishima Kei and Yamaguchi Tadashi was an enigma to the whole school. They were seemingly inseparable, ever since they were five. They didn’t talk much, sometimes Yamaguchi would say something and Kei would glare at him, but Kei glared at everyone so it wasn’t exactly out of the ordinary. Granted, It’s not like they had any other friends but each other. They were both social outcasts, Kei too blunt and Yamaguchi too shy. Maybe they were friends out of necessity. Maybe they actually cared for each other.

None of the above, thought Kei as his annoying neighbor threw his dinosaur toy across the room, smashing it against the wall. Yamaguchi admired his handiwork, and matched Kei's frown with an insufferable grin.

Not a day went by where 6-year-old Kei didn’t want to strangle Yamaguchi with his tiny fists. 

“That was my toy! You smashed my toy!” Kei screamed. He grabbed a pillow and threw it at Yamaguchi, who screamed back at him. In school, Yamaguchi was a shy kid. He barely talked to anyone, not because he didn’t like them, more because he was scared that they wouldn’t like him. It was a lot different at Kei’s house. 

Kei definitely liked Yamaguchi better at school. Not that he liked him anywhere. He was annoying and a crybaby and threw his stuff around. The only reason he hung out with him was because their moms were friends. It was an unfortunate circumstance. But they were two single moms living in the same neighborhood, right next to each other, so it was bound to happen at some point. There was nothing Kei could do about it. And he had tried. He proudly displayed the poster board presentation he made for his mom as to why he shouldn’t be forced to hang out with Yamaguchi anymore. It included 10 reasons written in a green glitter pen, drawings for visual demonstration, and a small rebuttal which let his mom know that she could make other friends other than Yamaguchi-san. Kei’s mom just laughed at him and ruffled his hair. Well, if he couldn’t convince his mom, the poster at least never failed to upset Yamaguchi. Kei figured it was because he couldn’t read. 

(“That’s not the reason! It’s just mean!”

“Shut up, Yamaguchi! It’s all true!”)

“Boys!” Kei’s mom called from the living room. The faint sound of the TV played in the background, along with the consistent bubble of boiling water for tea. Kei’s mom had invited Yamaguchi’s mom over for tea and a chat, which meant Kei was stuck with Yamaguchi for another hour. Kei learned to time out Yamaguchi’s visits since he was five, so he'd know exactly when he was leaving and countdown the minutes until it happened. “Please stop screaming!”

“It was Tsukishima’s fault!” Yamaguchi yelled back. 

Kei rolled his eyes. “You’re the one who just yelled. You’re the yeller, stupid.”   
  
“You yelled first, meanie!” 

“You threw my dinosaur toy!” And here they were, back at square one. They’d stay that way until Yamaguchi’s mom decided it would be getting late, which was in approximately 23 minutes, according to Kei’s froggie clock. 

“Boys.” This time, the voice was a lot softer and closer. Both boys spun around to see Yamaguchi-san, who was standing near Kei’s doorway with a slight smile. “Do you mind coming to the living room? Your mom and I-” she looked at Kei when she said that, “-need to talk to you both.” 

“Ok, mom!” Yamaguchi dropped his scowl for a bright smile, and his mom pinched his cheek with a grin before leaving the room. Yamaguchi took this opportunity to turn back to Kei and stick his tongue out. Kei glared at him. Why couldn’t Yamaguchi’s mom have stayed to see that? Both of their moms believed Yamaguchi to be a perfect angel. Them and the entire school just figured Yamaguchi was an innocent, small baby. They didn’t see what Kei saw. None of them ever saw Yamaguchi flush his action figures down the toilet because they made fun of his dorky socks. 

Both boys made their way to the living room, where their moms sat on the two armchairs across the couch. Empty cups of tea and plates with cookie crumbs on them covered the table. Kei absently stacked them while Yamaguchi kicked at the seat beside him. 

“So, what’s up?” Yamaguchi asked. 

The moms looked at each other and gave the boys a small smile. “Well,” Yamaguchi’s mom started. “You know how Kei-chan’s mom works at the restaurant next to the supermarket?”

“The one we went to for my birthday!” Yamaguchi exclaimed and his mom smiled at him. “Yes, that one.”

Kei remembered that birthday. He was forced to go, and no one else in their class showed up. Yamaguchi nearly cried, and Kei almost felt bad for him. Almost. He ended up getting free cake anyways. 

“Well, I’m starting to work there too, which means I can’t pick you up from school anymore, Tadashi. So, since Kei’s already familiar with the route from your school to the restaurant and home,” the moms looked at each other before continuing, “we thought you two could walk to and from school with each other.”

Kei was about to be sick. “No!” he yelled, looking over to Yamaguchi, who yelled the exact same thing. At least they were in agreement about one thing. 

“Why not?” Kei’s mom rubbed her temples together, as if she didn’t already know the answer. 

“I don’t want to walk with him!”   
  
“I don’t like him!”

“I don’t like him either!”   
  
“Yeah, he smells!”

“What?” Kei wrinkled his nose at him. “I don’t smell. You smell.”

“Do not!” 

“Boys!” Yamaguchi’s mom snapped, and they both looked up at her, dead silent. She looked tired, and after exchanging a weary glance with Kei’s mom, he realized that she looked the same way. “You’ll just have to figure out a way to get along for one walk to and from school. I’m sorry, but that’s just how it is now. You can’t fight all the time, boys. You’re big kids now! You should know better!” 

Kei’s mom added quickly, “It’s just a walk. Just so you two don’t get lost. You can do that, right?” 

The boys looked at each other with disgust, and turned back to their mom’s. Kei sighed. “Ok, mom.”

Yamaguchi grumbled an “okay” a few seconds later. Yamaguchi’s mom exhaled in relief, and slumped back into her chair before letting out a small chuckle. 

“You kids are going to be the death of us,” she laughed. Kei’s mom followed, and the two of them gave each other a knowing look in the middle of soft giggles. 

Yamaguchi and Kei did not join in with the laughter. 

___

“Just to be clear.” Kei turned around to see Yamaguchi coming up next to him wearing a big puffer jacket and gloves. He and Yamaguchi were standing in the middle of their houses, where they were supposed to meet up to walk to school. Yamaguchi didn’t look very thrilled to be there, and he mumbled the next sentences he said. “I don’t want to be here. I still don’t like you. I’m only doing this for my mom.” 

Kei rolled his eyes. “Whatever. Let’s go.” He turned around and started walking to school without looking back at Yamaguchi. 

They hadn’t made it too far when Kei heard a thud behind him. He groaned and turned around, where Yamaguchi had tripped and fallen over something. His bag had fallen open, and he was frantically shoving books back into it. 

“You had to trip.” Kei deadpanned. Yamaguchi glared up at him. 

“Can you help me?” he pleaded. Kei looked away from him and pretended to whistle. 

“Nope. I can’t. I don’t have legs.” He snorted at Yamaguchi's frown. 

“Fine! I don’t need your help then!” Yamaguchi continued shoveling things in his bag. 

Kei rolled his eyes. “You always do. If you didn’t need help, I wouldn’t have to walk you to school. Like you’re a baby or something.” 

Kei realized a bit too late that he must have been a little too mean because Yamaguchi shot up with tears brimming in his eyes. “I’m not a baby!”

“You are a baby! I have to walk you to school, even though I can do it by myself! Because I’m not a baby!” 

“Well, guess what!” Yamaguchi hefted his bag, and at that moment, Kei knew that he messed up. “I’ll go by myself then. Because I’m not a baby!”

And then suddenly, Yamaguchi was gone, and Kei was alone. 

Kei stood there for a while, before shrugging and making his way to school. Whatever. Yamaguchi could find his own way to school. See if Kei cared. 

Kei arrived at school and after a quick sweep of his class, he realized that Yamaguchi wasn’t in class. Whatever, he told Yamaguchi that he didn’t care and he really didn’t. He pulled out a worn book and started reading it while he waited for class to start. 

Kei looked at the clock on the wall. Five minutes to class. Yamaguchi still hadn’t made it. Kei shook the thought from his head and turned back to his book. 

3 minutes to class. Still no Yamaguchi. Kei started to think about this situation rationally. It was his responsibility to make sure Yamaguchi got to school. If Yamaguchi didn’t get to school, he would be the one in trouble. 

And maybe Kei cared a little bit if Yamaguchi didn’t make it to school. Like, what if he died? Kei was too young to be responsible for a death! He couldn’t even tie his own shoes yet! 

He groaned as he grabbed his bag and ran out of school to search for Yamaguchi. 

He ran all the way to the convenience store where they stopped, and started walking in the direction Yamaguchi had run off. He cupped his hands together and called out for him as he walked down the road. “Yamaguchi!” he called loudly. “Where are you?” 

Internally, Kei was panicking. Just a little. Not because he was worried about Yamaguchi. He was worried about not finding him at all. If Yamaguchi went missing again, he was going to be blamed again. Especially because it was literally his one job to get Yamaguchi to school and back. And the last time he “lost” Yamaguchi inside a locked closet door, he was grounded for a week. He didn’t like being grounded for a week. 

“Tsukishima?” A small voice peeked out from behind Kei. Yamaguchi was sitting on a park swing, eyes red and body shaking. Kei sighed and stepped inside the park, looking Yamaguchi over. 

“What are you doing here? School is that way?” Kei pointed far away from Yamaguchi. 

Yamaguchi shook his head, still blinking back tears. “I just started running. And there was this big man behind me.” Yamaguchi gestured behind him, as if the man was still there. “So I got scared and hid here.” Yamaguchi’s voice wobbled as he spoke, which made Kei wince. 

“Oh.” Kei pursed his lips together and looked down at his feet. “Then what? You just didn’t come to school?”

Yamaguchi shook his head again, looking everywhere but at Kei. Kei dropped his bag on the mulch and sat down on the swing next to Yamaguchi. 

“You can cry if you want. It’s not like I haven’t seen you cry before,” he mumbled. He wasn’t lying, exactly. The first time he met Yamaguchi, when they were five, he stubbed his toe against a table and cried for an hour. Kei had shoved his hands into his ears to block out the horrible sound and told the boy to shut up. 

In retrospect, it must have been more like a few minutes. But it FELT like hours. 

Yamaguchi shook his head another time. “I’m not crying. I’m not a baby.” 

Kei felt himself grow smaller after Yamaguchi said those words. He turned to Yamaguchi, who was still trying his best not to cry. He was crying anyways. Tears spilled over the swing set, the dirt, everywhere. Kei inhaled sharply. 

“Crying doesn’t make you a baby. Akiteru is eleven, and he still cries at everything.” 

Yamaguchi looked up at him with wide eyes. “Really?”

“Really. He cried so much after Toy Story, it was funny. I laughed at him a lot, until mom yelled at me.” Kei found himself laughing at the memory of his dorky older brother crying into his food after Toy Story ended. Yamaguchi giggled softly. 

“Akiteru-san is so cool.” Yamaguchi sighed in admiration. 

“He’s not that cool.”

“He’s cooler than you!”

“Is not.”

“Is too!”

“Whatever.” Kei got up and grabbed his backpack. He offered a hand to Yamaguchi. “Are you done crying? We’re going to be late to school.”

“Yeah.” Yamaguchi wiped a few stray tears from his eyes and got up. “I’m ok! Let’s go.”

Kei nodded, and gestured the way out. Yamaguchi followed close behind him as they walked to school. 

“Let’s not split up next time. It’s annoying. Your mom would kill me if I lost you.” Kei muttered. Yamaguchi beamed at him, and nodded wildly. 

“Duh. That would be stupid.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh my god how do six year olds talk. I haven't been six in like, ten years. I'll probably have the next chapter up in a week? Give or take?


	2. february 4, 2005

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It's all because Kei forgot his shoes at practice.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> HAPPY YAMAGUCHI DAY happy birthday to the best boy in the entire fucking world

It’s all because Kei forgot his shoes at school. 

It was a normal day otherwise. He and Yamaguchi fought on the way to school. He went to his classes fine. He ate lunch alone today, not wanting to deal with Yamaguchi. He was supposed to stay after school for club practice, which meant Yamaguchi was going to have to walk back home alone. He already let Yamaguchi know about this, which was what they fought over in the morning. Kei made some quip about how Yamaguchi didn’t have any other friends to walk home with, and Yamaguchi made the very accurate observation that Kei didn’t either. 

What a jerk. Not as big a jerk as Kei, but still. 

Kei never got around to making friends anyways. He was naturally unfriendly and had a knack for driving away any kid who could look past his personality. It was probably because of his height. Even though he was barely 8, he was already nearly 150 centimeters. He towered over everyone in his grade. It made him look way too intimidating for anyone to approach. Except for Yamaguchi. He wasn’t impressed at all. He had grown up around Kei’s ridiculous growth spurt, and he knew how sore his limbs would be in the morning, which in Yamaguchi’s opinion was “very lame.” 

Kei was walking home after a long and tedious afternoon of volleyball practice. His coach made them do receives all day, which he despised. Receives, as it turned out, required cooperation with his teammates, and that took way too much effort to actually do. Kei was already halfway home, rubbing the bruises on his forearms, when he realized that his bag felt much lighter than it was in the morning. With only a tiny amount of panic coursing through his veins, Kei dropped to his knees, slung his bag in front of him, and tore through it. He shook the bag one last time, for good measure, and groaned. His sneakers, the cool, flashy ones that Akiteru lent him for his first practice, weren’t there. 

Kei put everything carefully back in his bag, and dragged his feet on his way back to the school. Stupid Akiteru and his stupid sneakers. (Kei realized that he was the one who forgot them in the first place. He decided to ignore that fact.) 

He passed by the park Yamaguchi had run off to when they first walked to school. A few young kids were on the swingset, laughing as they talked and swung. They must have been 5 or 6 years old, the same age they were during that incident. 

Kei watched as the kids jumped down from the swings and ran in the opposite direction Kei was walking. They started to climb up the sycamore trees, still laughing as they fell down the tall branches. Kei shook his head dismissively at the small children as he walked past them. 

Kei hadn’t visited this park much. He didn’t know just how big it was. It stretched around the whole block, trees and pond filling up the areas that the playground couldn’t. He hummed softly to himself. Maybe he, his mom and Akiteru could visit one day. They could have a family picnic or something. He was thinking about the food his mom would pack for the picnic, when he turned a corner and gaped. Underneath the seesaw sat Yamaguchi. 

Well, Kei said “sat.” Really, he was lying down. His knees were covered in cuts, and he looked stunned at the three bullies towering over him. There was a huge bruise on the side of his face, and bags were surrounding him. Kei watched as another bully threw a bag at him, snickering. Yamaguchi’s face contorted, and welled up in tears. 

“He cries at everything!” One idiot wearing a blue shirt and holding a stick laughed at him. He poked at Yamaguchi with the stick. “Crybaby!” 

Yamaguchi looked like he would have burst out in tears right then. But he looked slightly to the left, and made eye contact with Kei, who was still frozen in place.

Kei looked over at the three boys, who were staring at him with a similar look of shock. Kei vaguely recognized them from school. They were local idiots, in Kei’s opinion. They liked bullying random kids who didn’t do anything. Kei couldn’t imagine being so boring and pathetic that you had to bother random people just for entertainment. 

One of the boys was about to open his mouth, maybe to speak, which Kei really didn’t want him to, for the sake of his eight-year-old sanity. 

“Lame,” he said after a while, and smirked internally as he saw the surprise on all their faces.  _ Congratulations, Kei. You single handedly defeated 3 bullies by making a random, semi-rude comment. Aren’t you the nicest guy in the world or what? _

__ Yamaguchi wasn’t crying anymore, he just looked up at Kei with awe on his face. Kei shook his head again, and started to walk away. 

“What do you mean?” he heard someone run up behind him and grab his backpack. “Hey, wait a sec!” Kei spun around and bent down menacingly to look him in the eyes. “What?”

The boy backed away, and a smug smile danced on Kei’s lips. “Well, you’re lame too, four-eyes!” The boy started to run away as Kei laughed at him. “Idiot! Idiot! Stupid!” 

Kei laughed at them until he heard a small sniffling voice. Yamaguchi was still looking up at him from his place on the dirt floor. Kei shuffled and looked at his shoes awkwardly. He looked up and gave Yamaguchi a small look, one that meant to ask him: “Are you ok?”

Yamaguchi huffed and looked the other way. Kei winced slightly, as if Yamaguchi had slapped him instead of just turning away. He thought of the kids falling from the sycamore trees, laughing as they hit the ground and laughing as they laid there. Those kids looked a lot happier laying on the ground than Yamaguchi did. Well, to be fair, Kei thought, those kids had also had someone to pull them up from the dirt and push them back up the tree. Yamaguchi was alone on the ground. 

Kei rolled his eyes, and made his way back to school. Yamaguchi would be fine. He still needed his sneakers. 

____

Neither Kei nor Yamaguchi brought up the park incident during their walk to school. Or during lunch. Kei thinks it’s the longest they’ve ever gone without bickering about something. 

Not that he had anything to say to Yamaguchi. He wouldn’t even know what to say.  _ Sorry you’re getting beat up? Your freckles aren’t the worst part about you? _ Anything he said would definitively make everything worse. 

So when school ended, he walked straight to volleyball practice without so much as a word to Yamaguchi. Maybe after a few days everything would go back to normal on it’s own. Anything was better than actual confrontation. 

When Kei found Yamaguchi standing near the door of the gym, peeking inside and looking around with a worried expression, he almost turned around and walked home. 

Instead, he walked straight ahead and stood right behind Yamaguchi before clearing his throat. 

Yamaguchi spun around and Kei glared at him. “What are you doing here?”

Yamaguchi didn’t retort back with something mean, much to Kei’s surprise. Yamaguchi looked down at his fidgeting hands before looking back up at Kei. 

“I just. Wanted to say thank you?”

Kei froze. 

“Thank you?” he repeated dumbly. “For what?”    


“You know? For yesterday? You chased those bullies away?” Yamaguchi was looking everywhere but at Kei’s face. Kei couldn’t say he didn’t appreciate the effort to avoid all eye contact. It made him seem a lot less lame for staring at his feet the entire time. 

Kei waved dismissively. “Whatever. I didn’t do anything. I just told them they were being pathetic. Which they were. There’s a lot wrong with you besides your stupid freckles.” 

Yamaguchi snapped up and stared Kei dead in the eyes. “Hey! You don’t see me making fun of your nerd glasses or your freakish height!”

“That’s literally all you do.” 

Yamaguchi shrugged. “Next time, just accept the thank you.” He looked behind Kei and Kei turned around to follow his gaze. “So, this is where you practice volleyball?” 

Kei nodded slightly. He watched as Yamaguchi stepped inside the gym with him. His eyes were transfixed on the players. Kei watched Yamaguchi’s eyes widen as a year 5 executed an awesome jump serve.

“That was so cool…” Yamaguchi mumbled under his breath with a voice full of awe. Kei puffed out his chest with pride. 

“Isn’t it?” he smirked. Yamaguchi turned to him with a dopey grin. 

“He’s probably a lot better than you. And cooler.” 

Kei’s smirk vanished. Yamaguchi snickered and turned back to the players. 

“It is really cool though. Isn’t Akiteru-san on the highschool team?”   


“Yup. At Karasuno. That powerhouse school.”

“Coooool!” Yamaguchi shoved Kei lightly. “Why is Akiteru-san so much cooler than you?” 

“He’s just older. I can be just as cool as he is.” Kei shoved back, but Yamaguchi didn’t heed him. His face was scrunched up, as if he was in deep thought, and he was playing with his fingers. 

“I need to join a club, anyways. All the other clubs are really scary,” he mumbled. 

Kei felt his chest sink. “You want to join volleyball?”

“Yeah?” Yamaguchi walked farther inside the gym and picked up a volleyball. He spun it around in his hands for dramatic effect. “Why not?”

“Because.” Kei grabbed the volleyball away from Yamaguchi. “I don’t want to be stuck with you. And you’re short. Volleyball is for tall people.”

“I’ll grow!” Yamaguchi exclaimed. “And whenever I play with Akiteru-san, he says I’m a natural at volleyball!”

“Aki’s just too nice.”

“You’re just too mean, Tsuki-” Yamaguchi was cut off with a ball flying at his face. He screamed and ducked just as the ball soared past him. Kei snorted next to him, and Yamaguchi glared at him. 

“Nice one, Yamaguchi.”

“I SAID, you’re MEAN, Tsuki-” Yamaguchi ducked as another ball flew past him. He put his hands on his knees, still crouched down, and exhaled sharply. “What is  _ with  _ that guy?" Yamaguchi's face sunk, and he turned to Kei in horror. "Do you think he's targeting me or something?” 

Kei choked back more giggles. “You keep breaking off after Tsuki-” Kei paused in the middle of his surname for dramatic effect. “Finish your sentences, dork.” 

Yamaguchi faltered, before standing upright, “No, that’s exactly what I meant to say. I’m calling you Tsukki from now on.”

Kei wrinkled his nose. “Don’t call me that. I hate that.” 

“Oh no!” Yamaguchi put a hand on his chest and feigned an expression of hurt. “I am so sorry! I would never call you a name you don’t like! Here-” He squeezed his eyes shut and held one hand up, as if he was making a scouts promise. “I solemnly swear to never-”

“You got that from Harry Potter, didn’t you?”

“Shhh! I solemnly swear to never call Tsukki “Tsukki.” I know that Tsukki doesn’t like being called “Tsukki” because Tsukki thinks it's very annoying and Tsukki doesn’t like it, so I won’t call Tsukki “Tsukki” ever again.” Yamaguchi opened an eye and giggled at him. “Is that good, Tsukki?”   


Kei threw the volleyball at him. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Kei: I hate Yamaguchi  
> Kei’s inner monologue: Yamaguchi Yamaguchi Yamaguchi Yamaguchi-


	3. august 26, 2007

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kei’s hands had grown since he was 6. They were perfect for blocking and he was sure they could hold a lot more sand than when he was 6. So he was sure that at least one of the possible grains he could fit in his palm was ingrained with the knowledge that any action followed by the words “Watch me!” exclaimed by an impulsive 10 year old could only end in disaster. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Furudate: Yamaguchi is the type to act before he thinks.  
> Me, frantically taking notes: I see.
> 
> Also there is a warning for descriptions of blood and scrapes, it's from "Yamaguchi had managed to stop screaming" until the next paragraph.

Kei didn’t understand why he couldn’t make friends. He was doing fine in volleyball club. Maybe he was a little standoffish, but he didn’t think it was THAT big of a deal. There were plenty of complete idiots in their grade who had at least a few friends to hang out with outside of class. And they really were complete idiots. Kei didn’t know it was possible for a person’s IQ to be that low until he met his classmates. 

Akiteru told him that it was stuff like that that made him so unapproachable. Kei decided to ignore him.

Most of the time, Kei was ok with not having any friends. He always suspected that he would never be able to keep up with them anyways. People always seemed to be moving a mile a minute, and in the complete opposite direction of Kei. Plus, he was always reading these books where characters would talk about how friendships meant “understanding each other” and “making compromises” which Kei had no interest in. But not having any friends meant that there was no one to enjoy summer break with. 

It was one of the hottest days of the year, and Kei’s mom didn’t want to waste it inside. Because according to his mom, spending the hottest day ever inside with air conditioning and fans and Dinosaur Train blaring on the TV wasn’t fun at all. 

She packed a bag and set off to go shopping with Yamaguchi’s mom. And with his stupidly social brother going off with his stupidly social friends, Kei was left alone in the park with Yamaguchi, who was apparently trying to die on the swing set. 

Well, he wasn’t actively trying to die. But in Kei’s opinion, a combination of Yamaguchi’s clumsiness and the sheer height of the swing he was sitting on was an accident waiting to happen. 

Kei wished he had his mom’s phone to record it. 

Kei wasn’t much for erratic swinging, unlike Yamaguchi. He was calmly swaying back and forth on his swing, snickering at Yamaguchi softly. During his drop down, Yamaguchi must have heard Kei, because he glared at him from his place way up in the sky. 

“What are you-” Yamaguchi zipped past him as the swing shot up on the other side. It hovered there for a while before swinging back. “-laughing about? At least I-” Swing. “-can get up this high!” 

Kei shook his head. “So? Anyone can get up that high. I just don’t wanna break my neck.” 

Yamaguchi frowned at him. “You’re so boring!” Swing. “It feels like-” Swing. “I’m flying!” 

Kei smirked at him, and lightly pushed himself off the swing to face Yamaguchi. “You aren’t flying. You’re literally sitting on a swing.” 

“So? The swing is flying! And I’m on it! So I’m flying.”

“Oh yeah? If a plane is flying, and you’re on the plane, are you flying, or are you just sitting in there while the plane is flying?” 

Yamaguchi frowned, and for a second, Kei thought he won that mini debate. 

“I’m still flying!”

“You can’t fly!” 

Yamaguchi quirked an eyebrow at him. “Oh yeah? Watch me.” 

Kei was only 10, so according to his mother and older brother, he was way too young to know everything in the world, much to his own dismay. One day, when he was 6 years old and acting particularly arrogant during a beach trip, his mom sat him down and made him pick up a fistful of sand. Kei sunk his abnormally large baby hands into the sand and proudly displayed them to his mom. She had smiled and tapped his enclosed fists. 

“Now, the amount of sand in your hands is how much you-” she poked Kei’s head, “-know.”

“That’s a lot!” Kei had exclaimed, and his mom laughed. 

“That is! But you see all the sand left on the beach?” 

Kei had looked around as sand seeped from his fingers. The beach seemed to extend forever, dunes covering every inch of it. He turned to his mom and nodded. 

His mom had nodded back with a satisfied expression on her face. “The amount of sand left is everything you don’t know.”

Kei had dropped the sand in his hands and sat down on the beach towel with a confused expression. “But that’s so much!”

“Yes!” His mom had laughed. Kei felt inclined to laugh back. “No one is ever going to have that much sand in their hands. No one in the world can know everything. Not even you,” she poked Kei again and he giggled slightly, “smarty pants.” 

Kei’s hands had grown since then. They were perfect for blocking and he was sure they could hold a lot more sand than when he was 6. So he was sure that at least one of the possible grains he could fit in his palm was ingrained with the knowledge that any action followed by the words “Watch me!” exclaimed by an impulsive 10 year old could only end in disaster.

Yamaguchi swung in front, and Kei swerved to the right to watch as Yamaguchi pushed off the swing high up in the air. 

The sun was burning hot and blindingly bright that day. Yamaguchi had flown up so high, the sun framed his head and made it seem like his hair was on fire. He turned to Kei midair, and shot up a grin that rivalled the sun. Kei couldn’t help but inhale sharply. Seeing Yamaguchi so high up, practically a silhouette illuminated by the sun, it really did look like he was flying. 

Then, Yamaguchi crashed onto the ground with a loud scream. 

Kei could only roll his eyes before running over to the screaming boy. 

Yamaguchi had managed to stop screaming when Kei got there, but his face was still contorted in pain and his eyes were close to welling up. When Kei bent down to check out his knee, his face nearly contorted into the same expression of pain as Yamaguchi’s. The skin on his knees were peeling off and flaky, with blood oozing from them. Kei tried to offer Yamaguchi a hand up, and when he tried to take it, Yamaguchi nearly screamed again, and dropped his hand. After more inspection, the two realized that Yamaguchi’s hands were also scuffed up and peeling from breaking his fall. 

“Be lucky it isn’t your head.” Kei mumbled as he grabbed Yamaguchi’s forearms and helped him up. Yamaguchi winced at the sudden movement, and nearly doubled into Kei’s side. He turned to the taller boy and stuck his tongue out at him. 

“Sorry, Tsukki.” Kei grimaced at the annoying nickname the boy was still adamant on using. “Next time, I’ll make sure to hit my head too.”

“Please don’t.” Kei all but forcibly dragged Yamaguchi out of the park. Yamaguchi let out a sharp exhale of breath every time he limped out. “There’s a shop thing nearby. We can get some bandages. Mom gave me her wallet for ice cream and stuff.” 

Yamaguchi nodded, and the two of them stumbled their way to the shop. The cashier, some scary looking guy with spiky blond hair, looked them over, like they were delinquents or something. Which, to be fair, they were two unsupervised children bleeding all over the shop floor. 

“I’m fine, now,” Yamaguchi said suddenly, and pried himself away from Kei. He stared ahead at the medicine aisle of the store with determination. Kei examined his knees. Sure enough, the bleeding had more or less stopped. It dried around his skin, leaving him with nasty cuts and scabs over his legs. Yamaguchi limped over to the bandages, and Kei followed, grabbing strips of bandages and antiseptic wipes from the shelves as he followed. 

“Is this good?” Kei gestured to the supplies in his arms. Yamaguchi gave him a weak thumbs up, and turned to the shelves he had stopped in front of. Kei frowned. “What are you looking at?”

Yamaguchi picked something up and turned around, holding a box with a dopey grin on his face. “Green hair dye! I wanna try it at the park when we get back.”

Kei blinked. “You’re literally bleeding out and your first thought was to grab some green hair dye?” 

Yamaguchi shrugged. “Eh. I can barely feel my legs now, anyways?”

“You- you get how that’s worse? Right? You know that’s much worse?” Kei stammered, and Yamaguchi waved him off. 

“I get cuts all the time. You’re freaking out too much. Chill out!”

“The most anxious person I have ever met is telling me to ‘chill out.’ The world is ending.” 

Yamaguchi dropped the dye in Kei’s arms, and shrugged again. “C’mon. Let’s check these out.”

Kei muttered something about reckless idiots and followed Yamaguchi to the counter, where he unceremoniously dumped their items. Kei shoved a few of his mom's bills on the counter next to them, and turned away from the scary blond man. 

Yamaguchi was nervously making small talk with the cashier while he rang up their stuff, so Kei trained his eyes to the stand next to the checkout counter. His eyes stopped at a pair of headphones hanging from a box. They were an older model, so they were marked down by a lot, but the box was still brand new. According to the magazine on Akiteru’s desk, they were compatible with any device, had amazing speakers, and came in baby blue, snow white, crow black, and blood red. This particular pair happened to be snow white. He remembered Akiteru coming home a few months ago with the black version of these, showing off how good the sound was. Kei thought it was the coolest thing ever. Akiteru did technically tell Kei that they were his headphones too though, so he really didn’t need the pair. 

Still. They looked cool. 

He heard Yamaguchi giggle from beside him, so he turned to glare at the smaller boy. “What.”

“You’ve been staring at those headphones for like, 10 minutes. Are you gonna buy them?”

Kei shook his head, and Yamaguchi nodded. “Yeah, they look kinda lame anyways.”

Kei fished out the rest of the bills from his mom’s wallet and slammed the headphones on the counter next to Yamaguchi’s box dye. He could swear that Yamaguchi’s smile got wider. 

______

“Ow ow ow OW. I think this hurts more than the actual scrapes,” Yamaguchi complained as Kei rubbed at his knees with the antiseptic wipe. They were back at the park and found some shade by a bench under the trees. Kei scowled at Yamaguchi and resisted the urge to throw the wipe at his face. 

“If it hurts so much, why don’t you just do it yourself?” He grumbled, and just for good measure, he pressed the wipe harder into Yamaguchi’s knee. 

“Stop, that hurts! And I’m trying to figure out how to use this hair dye.” Yamaguchi waved the box in his hands for emphasis. Right, the stupid box dye. Kei had tucked his new and very cool (Shut up, Yamaguchi) headphones into his bag, far away from the dye. Because he couldn’t foresee a future where that dye didn’t get anywhere. 

“Right. Because that dye is a priority.” He shook his head and wiped off Yamaguchi’s other knee. Yamaguchi tore his eyes away from the box to give Kei a confused look. 

“What’s ‘priority’ mean?” he wondered out loud, and Kei snorted. He tossed the dirty wipe in the bag and stuck bandaids all around Yamaguchi’s knee. 

“There. You can stop freaking out about the stupid antiseptic wipes now.” 

“...antiseptum wipes?”

“Antiseptic,” Kei corrected. Yamaguchi rolled his eyes at him. 

“I get it, Tsukki. You’re in advanced classes. Now use that... smartness and help me with the dye.” Yamaguchi shoved the box in Kei’s hands, who shoved it back at Yamaguchi.

“I’m not touching that! I don’t want my shirt to get dirty!” 

“Hm,” Yamaguchi hummed, and slid down from the bench to sit on the grass. He started to open the box and lay everything down in front of him. 

“Why are you on the grass?” Kei cocked his head to the side. 

“So, if I get the dye everywhere, it’ll blend into the grass!”

“That’s a horrible idea.” Kei slid down with him. “Then the grass is gonna get weird chemicals in it.” 

Yamaguchi froze, and his eyes widened. “Oh, I didn’t think about that! Would that hurt the grass? And the trees?”

Kei looked up from their place on the ground. The trees shot high in the sky, forming a perfect canopy above the two. Sunlight streamed from small gaps in the leaves, acting like mini spotlights in an otherwise dark field. He vaguely wondered if these were the same trees those kids were climbing years ago. The trees from 2 years ago must have grown even taller. Grown even more branches for even more small kids to fall off. Those trees seemed way too strong to be affected by some stupid hair dye. 

“Tsukki? Are we going to kill the trees?”

His attention snapped back to Yamaguchi, who had moved directly into one of the spotlights made by the gaps in the leaves. He looked like he was glowing, compared to the darkness of the place they were sitting. His worried expression brought Kei back to reality, and he shrugged. 

“They’re just trees.”

Yamaguchi seemed furious. “No, they’re _ living things _ .” He put a crazy big emphasis on the phrase “living things.” “I don’t want to hurt them! What if they get poisoned? Or die? What if we ruin the park forever?”

Kei blinked at him. “Uh. I don’t think that’s gonna happen.”

Yamaguchi didn’t look convinced at all, so Kei sighed and rubbed his temples. “Let’s just bring a towel or something then.”

Yamaguchi nodded with a fierce determination, and ran out of the clearing, probably to find some. Kei watched him with a stunned expression. How someone could be so nervous around literally anyone and anything else, but somehow act so hyper around Kei, be reckless enough to jump from swings and run around the park to protect some stupid trees, Kei would never understand. 

Kei dug into the dirt next to him, and pulled up a handful of grass and weeds and crumbly soil in his hands. He examined it closely. His hands had gotten bigger since he was six years old. Surely, that meant he understood even more about the world now. He could fit more sand in his hands. Maybe the cluster of weeds sticking out by his pinky were the new words he learned. The tiny rock he pulled up that was digging into his palm was the long division and multiplication that he learned in school. The patch of dirt that was darker than the rest was all his new volleyball knowledge. His blocking skills, his serves, maybe even his receives (even though Yamaguchi said he was awful at those. What did Yamaguchi know anyways?)

Kei clenched his fist full of dirt tighter, and looked around the field. He was all by himself, surrounded by the green of grass, clovers, and sycamore trees rocketing far up in the sky. It was like he was six again, staring at fields of sand that stretched out for miles. 

He opened his palm and let the dirt seep from his fingers. Kei learned a lot since he was six. About himself, his family, school, life. But anything about Yamaguchi (actually meaningful things about Yamaguchi, not just his favorite cereal and ice cream flavor and basic stuff like that) was still hiding in the sand, untouched by Kei’s fists. 

He had a weird feeling that comparing his (childhood headache? Worst nightmare? Guy he hung out with that he barely tolerated?) annoying neighbor to dirt was just slightly weird. He probably shouldn’t be caring too much about him in the first place anyways. He was perfectly fine leaving Yamaguchi’s pile of dirt untouched. 

(Again! With the lame dirt metaphors!)

Kei wiped the dirt from his palms on the grass. Yamaguchi came back a few minutes later holding two towels, and Kei was certain neither belonged to him. Yamaguchi laid one of the towels on the ground, and sat on it. 

Kei scooted on the towel as well, and played with the hem. “Where did you get these?”

Yamaguchi wrapped the other towel around his neck and shrugged. “They were lying on a bench. Near that place next to the park.”

Kei gaped at him. “You mean a  _ pool _ ? You stole towels from someone who’s currently in a  _ pool _ ?”

Yamaguchi flushed. “I’ll return it! I promise!”

“It’s going to be covered in dye.”

“I’ll wash it out! Really good!” Yamaguchi was fiddling with the towel around his neck now, with a look of uncertainty on his face. Kei sighed, and picked up the dye bottle. 

“Fine. How are you doing this then?”

Yamaguchi beamed at him, before realizing he was beaming at  _ Kei ew what the heck.  _ He took the bottle from him and poured all the contents in a plastic bowl, along with water from Kei’s water bottle. He grabbed a comb from the box and stirred it together, then held the weird mixture in front of Kei like it was a great invention.

“I think we just use the combs and put it all up in my hair, and then wash it off later. Here.” Yamaguchi handed him a comb. “Help me put it on.” 

Kei twirled the comb around in his hand. “Why would I do that?”

“I’ll dye your hair green in your sleep if you don’t.”

Kei started combing the mixture into Yamaguchi’s hair. 

___

Kei and Yamaguchi certainly got an earful from their mothers when they stopped by to pick up their darling sons at the park. 

Kei wasn’t sure whether it was the fact that Yamaguchi was covered in multiple bandages, the fact that Kei spent nearly all of his mom’s money on a pair of headphones that his brother already owned, or the fact that their newly stained green clothing and skin matched Yamaguchi’s now greenish hair. 

“And! You two stole towels from those poor boys at the pool!” Yamaguchi’s mom yelled. 

Ah. Kei forgot about that part. 

Yamaguchi looked like he was on the verge of a breakdown, and for once, Kei agreed. He turned to his own mom, who was waving his new headphones, and cringed. He didn’t think he had ever seen her this mad. 

“Kei, just. What were you thinking? What were both of you thinking?” she sighed, and rubbed her temples. Kei and Yamaguchi both bowed their heads in shame. 

“Sorry,” they mumbled in unison. The moms exchanged exasperated glances, and turned back to their sons, who refused to look them in the eyes. 

“On the bright side-” Kei started, and his mom’s head whipped around to look at Kei in the eyes. 

“Tsukishima Kei. You think about your next words carefully.” 

Kei gulped and gestured to the two of them. “We didn’t try to kill each other once during today?” he tried. Yamaguchi nodded wildly at him, as if to accent his point. 

“That’s! That’s barely a silver lining!” his mom exclaimed. 

Kei turned to Yamaguchi, who mouthed ‘ _ what’s a silver lining?’ _ Kei shrugged at him in response. 

Yamaguchi’s mom raised her hands up, as a silent peace gesture, and the park went quiet again. “We’ll continue this conversation at home. Separately.” Yamaguchi’s mom looked at both of them pointedly, and they nodded in understanding. “But I’m just putting this out there.” She turned to Kei’s mom. “Grounded for a week?” 

“A week and a half,” she corrected. “And I’m taking these headphones for that week and a half.” She waved the headphones again, and Kei opened his mouth to protest before doing the right thing and shutting up. 

He and Yamaguchi gave each other dejected waves as they walked into their respective houses. Kei sat down on the couch, waiting for more yelling to come. Instead, his mom placed the headphones on the table, and moved her hand to examine a lock of Kei’s hair. 

“The green looks interesting,” she remarked, and Kei felt himself flush. He moved his hand to thread his fingers through the green streak. 

“Yeah.” He smiled softly. “It was Yamaguchi’s fault.” 

“Oh.” His mom picked up the headphones and slid them up on the highest counter in the house, the one only Akiteru could reach. She reached into the drawer to pull out a pair of scissors. “Do you want me to cut it off?”

Kei shook his head, and his mom put down the scissors. “It’s fine, I like it. I can keep it.” 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> God, I love Kei’s mom so much.  
> Also me in one fic: Keis headphones were very expensive be careful with them.  
> Me in this fic: yeah he bought those crappy knockoff SONYS at the fucking supermarket out of sheer spite.
> 
> Fun Fact, that sand metaphor thing is actually a Tamil proverb that my dad told me when I was a little kid, because I too was an arrogant little nuisance when I was 10. 
> 
> I'll maybe have the next chapter up next week?


	4. march 23, 2010

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "Do you think we're both losers?" Yamaguchi said one day.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I’m midway through this chapter when I realize that I’m basing Kei and Yamaguchi’s friendship/annoyance off of my childhood friend/neighbor. We used to bully each other and fist fight and annoy the shit out of each other but we were also like? friends-ish? frenemies? Like we were always there for each other and I genuinely miss him so Amogh, if you’re reading this, go outside you weeb fuck. Go hold hands premaritally with your girlfriend or something, if she hasn’t dumped you already. Also this chapter is dedicated to Zhea’s grandmother, my new bestie and number one Yamaguchi stan.

“Do you think we’re both losers?” Yamaguchi said one day during lunch. 

Kei looked up at him and frowned. “I think  _ you’re _ a loser. The jury’s still out on me.” 

Yamaguchi snorted and popped some egg in his mouth. “No, you’re definitely a loser. You’ve just been hanging around too many school kids who think you’re cool and scary.” 

Kei frowned at him. “I am cool and scary. Maybe you’re just so far on the other end of the spectrum, it balances out.”

“No way.” Yamaguchi shook his head adamantly. “Shouldn’t someone who’s an uncool coward be terrified of you?”

“Eh.” Kei shrugged. “Balances are weird like that.” 

Yamaguchi rolled his eyes. “Sure. Whatever you say, Tsukki.” 

Kei picked at the rice in his box, instead opting to watch Yamaguchi eat his noodles in silence. He wasn’t entirely wrong, Kei conceded. The two of them weren’t the most popular people on the planet. Sure, Kei had grown into his scary demeanor quite well, now towering over most of his class at 182 cm. He got the odd confession now and then, but most of the time, people didn’t really like him. He was still as cold and harsh as he was when he was a little kid. On the exact opposite spectrum, Yamaguchi was overly nice to people. Sure, he still made fun of people when he and Kei were alone, and laughed when Kei would snark at idiots in class (before a look of mortification passed over both of their faces that they actually agreed about something) but usually, he was a genuinely nice person. He apologized way too much for his own good, waved “hi” to everyone in the hallways in between classes, and was always willing to help people with their math homework. Kei once thought that this meant Yamaguchi would be popular and well liked. Then while walking across school grounds one day, Kei overheard two boys in his class snickered silently to themselves. He stepped closer to listen and found them making fun of Yamaguchi for being “an overtly nice pushover who trails behind that one scary blond asshole in their science class.” Kei quickly walked away from them, not sure why he was seething so much. He really didn’t care what other people had to say about Yamaguchi, no matter how untrue it was. In Kei’s opinion, if they were going to diss Yamaguchi they could at least do it accurately, like Kei. 

“I’m pretty sure people actually think we’re best friends or something,” Yamaguchi said nonchalantly, effectively ending Kei’s train of thought. 

“They think  _ what _ ?” 

“Yeah,” Yamaguchi snorted. He tried to grab a piece of chicken from Kei’s box, giving Kei a sheepish grin when he was swatted away. “I was talking to this one girl in class and she kept referring to you as my ‘best friend.’” Yamaguchi put the words in air quotes. “So I asked her about it and she was like, what? And she was like ‘don’t you guys hang out like all the time or whatever? Everyone thinks you’re besties.’ And I was like ‘uhh, no we’re not, what the hell.’” Yamaguchi shot out a nervous laugh. “It was an interesting talk.”

Kei tried his best to process that. It proved to be difficult, especially with all the worthless filler words tossed in between actual information. “What kind of logic is that? We hang out, I guess. But it’s not like I like you or anything.”

“Harsh,” Yamaguchi frowned for a split second before shrugging. “But fair. I dunno. I guess we do like, only hang out with each other. And we’re both kinda quiet. So it would make sense why people think that.” 

“Yeah,” Kei found himself saying. “But we aren’t friends or anything.”

“True,” Yamaguchi said softly. He furrowed his eyebrows in thought for a second, before snapping his fingers. “Best enemies, then?”

“Lame. Also, you don’t deserve enemy status.”

Yamaguchi kicked him from under the table. “What, are you saving enemy status for an arch rival or something? What are you, Spider-man?”

Kei rolled his eyes. “No actual human being should have an arch rival. Unless they’re delusional or read way too many dumb superhero comics.” 

Yamaguchi moved to kick Kei again, but he moved his feet out of the way. Yamaguchi’s foot caught the back of the bench, so Kei took his chance to kick Yamaguchi back. The two of them wrestled under the table before Yamaguchi could breathe out. “Ok, ok! How about best frenemies?”

Kei stopped kicking. “Wow. I didn’t think you could think of something even lamer.” 

“Do you have another idea then?”

Kei kicked the sole of Yamaguchi’s shoe again for good measure. “Whatever, Yamaguchi. I don’t care.” 

When they got back to class, Kei couldn’t help but settle his eyes on Yamaguchi, who was breezing through some math. He frowned. It wasn’t that he thought Yamaguchi would be a bad best friend. He just never thought they could count as friends. What did friends do, anyways? Friends hang out a lot. Check. Do friends share things? If stealing each other’s things and returning it to them only when the other actually started screaming for it back counted, then check. Friends like each other’s company, right? 

Kei found himself almost going to check off that box, before dragging himself back a notch. 

Class ended and Kei made sure to catch Yamaguchi’s attention and gesture to the door with his chin before heading out. He was at the front gate when he could finally hear Yamaguchi’s footsteps catch up to him. The running behind him stopped and the two walked home in sync. 

Technically, they were both 13 now. They could walk home by themselves if they so desired. But Kei found it hard to break from routines, as did Yamaguchi, so they never ended up breaking their tradition of walking home in comfortable silence (save for some bickering, of course.) 

“Is your mom coming home early today?” Yamaguchi asked suddenly. Kei turned to face him with a confused expression. Yamaguchi was staring at his phone, ready to type out a reply.

“Yeah, she is. Why?” Kei shrugged. 

“Oh, my mom texted. She’s working overtime, so she asked me to stay over for dinner at your house.” Yamaguchi looked up from his phone and smiled. “It’s been a while since I’ve had dinner at your place, huh?” 

Kei just nodded. It had been a while since Yamaguchi came over. His mom still visited Kei’s often, but she never brought Yamaguchi with her anymore, considering he was old enough to be left alone. Kei knew he was supposed to appreciate the peace and quiet, but it still felt weird. Like their life was changing too quickly.

Yamaguchi hummed while he walked, and Kei realized that he no longer had to bend down all the way to meet Yamaguchi’s face. Maybe it was because he stood next to Kei a lot, but Yamaguchi was a lot taller than he appeared to be. He was just a few centimeters from Kei’s height, as a matter of fact. A weird thought entered Kei’s head: what if Yamaguchi grew taller than him one day? 

Panic shot through him for no good reason. Kei shoved it down. 

“I hope she makes houtou. Her noodles are the best,” Yamaguchi mused, mostly to himself. Kei snorted. 

“We tried to make them once, while she wasn’t home. We nearly burnt down the damn kitchen.” 

“Oh, I remember that! You and Akiteru were like… running out and screaming!” Yamaguchi waved his hands around frantically, maybe to capture the panic from that day. He stopped giggling and let out a long sigh. “It’s a lot more quiet now.” 

Kei stared dumbly at Yamaguchi. “What?”

“You know!” Yamaguchi shrugged. “Akiteru-san is in college. Our moms work. We don’t go to each other’s houses that much. It’s just a lot more quiet now.”

Huh, Kei thought. He was right. When Kei was 7, he could barely remember a day that didn’t consist of his brother annoying him, or Yamaguchi-san coming over with Yamaguchi for dinner and having fights at the table while the moms gossiped or playing video games until 3 am with the two of them until they got yelled at. Kei hadn’t even noticed his home growing quieter and quieter. His mom working overtime more often. Yamaguchi not visiting anymore. His brother leaving. 

The house was just him now.

“I mean, you still come over sometimes. No one’s stopping you from coming over,” Kei mumbled. 

Yamaguchi shook his head. “No way, you hate whenever I visit. Don’t you, frenemy?” 

Did he? Did Kei hate it when he visited? Kei used to, for sure, but now, he couldn’t even tell. 

“Drop the stupid name.” Yamaguchi practically glowed at the realization that he now had another annoying nickname to pester Kei with. 

(So be fair, Kei was starting to find ‘Tsukki’ less annoying nowadays. Not that he would ever tell Yamaguchi. Yamaguchi might try to find another annoying nickname if he knew.)

“And it’s- it’s not like that ever stopped you. You’re annoying like that,” Kei mumbled.

Yamaguchi shot him a lopsided grin. “You know what? You’re not wrong!” 

Yamaguchi turned away with a small smile on his face. He fiddled with a green piece of flyaway hair while rambling about a new video game. Since that day at the park. Yamaguchi had dyed his hair green so many times, the hair dye was starting to stain his natural hair a brownish-green. It was like Yamaguchi didn’t even have to dye it anymore. Kei found himself missing his own green streak, one that faded away a few years ago. 

Kei could picture dinner tonight, the smell of his mom’s cooking flooding the room, him and Yamaguchi fighting over video games and homework, Yamaguchi’s mom joining them late and the two boys trying to eavesdrop on their conversation from Kei’s room. 

He looked the other way, so Yamaguchi wouldn’t see the small smile on his face. The house would be less quiet tonight. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I had to publish this a few days early because of a stupid game ribskyuu is playing. anyways, the updates are gonna be delayed a few weeks because of the game, we can't talk about our faves at all and tsukshima and yamaguchi happen to be my faves. whoops.


	5. october 12th, 2012

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "Seriously, Tsukki! They keep going on about how they make the other ‘invincible’ and ‘stronger’ and ‘balance each other’s weaknesses out.’ They are one gay-coded-partner-slash-best-friend-related adjective away from being historically good friends who send each other best friend letters confessing their platonic undying love for each other.” Yamaguchi waved a distressed fry in Kei’s face. 
> 
> Kei swatted the fry away and shoved some cake in his mouth to cover his grin. “That’s such a specific comment, what the hell.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So they finally turned 16 and I immediately start cursing like a sailor, singlehandedly bringing this fic rating up to T. Nice work, me. Also a few warnings for this chapter: there is referenced homophobia throughout it. violence at line: "Yamaguchi was pressed up against a wall" and ends at: "Kei was used to people being scared of him."

Kei was around 15 years old when he realized he was gay. It wasn’t a profound realization. To be frank he wasn’t even thinking about attraction to anyone until his idiot second year teammates decided to shove a bunch of magazines under his face and he decided that he would rather stab his eyes out than see another fucking girl group magazine again. 

It was after that thought that Kei realized he might be ever so slightly gay.

It was a statement formed from theory, not practice. He couldn’t think of a single person in real life that he was actually attracted to. Nope. Absolutely not. 

He sure as hell wasn’t ashamed of it, either. He was a pretty private person in general, but if someone asked him or god forbid tried to shove another fucking magazine in his face he would adamantly say that he was gay GODDAMMIT now put those magazines away before I BURN THEM.

The first person he really came out to was Yamaguchi. Not out of friendship or trust or anything. Yamaguchi just happened to borrow (steal) his laptop on the exact date Kei decided to google “How do you know if I’m gay” and just forget to close the damn tab. He ended up throwing the computer back at Kei and going “same” and that was that. 

Shit had happened since then. He turned 16, for one. He came out to his mom, who gave him a hug and took him and Yamaguchi out for cake. He actually hung out with Yamaguchi a lot more, for that matter. He practiced with him nearly everyday. They were in all the same classes. He came over a lot more often to do homework and eat dinner. Considering all the extra terrible company Kei had to surround himself with in the Karasuno Men’s Volleyball Club, Yamaguchi was slowly turning into a refreshing face to see everyday. It was an uncomfortable thought at first, Yamaguchi’s face being associated with good company, but it ended up not being soooo bad. He was better company than most of their hyper enthusiastic team anyways. And his hair, although still a muted green, was a lot less outrageous to look at than  _ bright fucking orange.  _

Kei also discovered the curt “same” he received from Yamaguchi that one unfaithful day actually meant that he was in fact bi, and had known for quite some time. Not that that realization changed anything at all. He was still just Kei’s annoying neighbor/volleyball teammate/sorta frenemy (at least in Yamaguchi’s eyes.) Kei supposed that he and Yamaguchi did shittalk a lot more people now, and with the newfound knowledge of their sexualities, they were able to insult people in ways unimaginable. Kei would make a quip about how unfortunate it must be to be heterosexual while watching Tanaka hopelessly flirt with Shimizu, and Yamaguchi would groan and give Kei an  _ “are you seeing this?” _ look every time Hinata and Kageyama did some weirdly close bro thing during their attacks. It was interesting. Kei liked it. 

(“Seriously, Tsukki! They keep going on about how they make the other ‘invincible’ and ‘stronger’ and ‘balance each other’s weaknesses out.’ They are one gay-coded-partner-slash-best-friend-related adjective away from being historically good friends who send each other best friend letters confessing their platonic undying love for each other.” Yamaguchi waved a distressed fry in Kei’s face. 

Kei swatted the fry away and shoved some cake in his mouth to cover his grin. “That’s such a specific comment, what the hell.”

“It’s like Achilles and Patroclus or something, but less death and incest.” 

“Hm.” Kei hummed. “Don’t you wish there was just a little more death, though? Some peace and quiet would be nice during practice.”

“Tsukki!”) 

The dynamic shift between the two was something Kei didn’t even comprehend. One day, they were just walking home from school and talking organically. They even started making plans for the weekend, plans that weren’t forced upon them by their moms. Honestly, it was like Kei blinked and he had a. A friend? That’s what those were? Weird. 

“Tsukishima! Get that ball!” Hinata screamed at him. Kei sighed and ran to receive the volleybal before it hit the floor. The ball went flying up, and he watched as Kageyama set it straight into Hinata’s spike. He made eye contact with Yamaguchi across the court and they both shivered in unison. They were creepy, those two. 

“You two are creepy when you do that,” Kei said bluntly. Yamaguchi stifled a laugh behind a cough on the other side of the net.

“Hey! What the hell, dude! It’s not our fault that we have a cool attack and you don’t!” Hinata exclaimed. Kageyama was nodding fiercely behind him. Kei rolled his eyes and served the ball. 

Practice wrapped up early, and the first years lined up outside the gym to go home. Yamaguchi was casually slipping on his shoes while Hinata and Kageyama were doing… something. Kei wasn’t sure whether they were fighting or aggressively agreeing with each other. 

Kei made a sound of annoyance at the two, and watched as Yamaguchi stifled another giggle. He shot Yamaguchi a look, and he replied with a small smile and shrug. Asshole. 

“I don’t know why Yamaguchi puts up with Tsukishima!” Hinata said loudly. Kei turned to face Hinata, who was looking up at him with defiant eyes. “He’s so much nicer than you are.”

Kei stifled his own laughter this time. “I don’t know why either, honestly. Yamaguchi?”

Yamaguchi made a small hum to indicate that he had no clue either. "Force of habit, I guess. You get used to it." 

Hinata didn't seem too convince by the answer and Kei resisted the urge to roll his eyes. "Let's go, Yamaguchi." He gestured out of the school. Yamaguchi gave the idiots a small wave, and the two started to walk home. 

Once out of earshot from Hinata and Kageyama, the two burst out laughing.

“You? Too nice for me? As if?” Kei breathed out.

Yamaguchi’s giggles began to subdue. “Hey, in his defense, I am very nice.”

“To like, everyone but me.”

“Yes.” Yamaguchi nodded and poked Kei in the side. “But you deserve it, asshole.”

The two of them continued walking home, talking casually as they cut through the park. 

“I’ve always wanted to have a picnic here,” Kei mused. 

“Really?” Yamaguchi’s eyes scanned the park. “Where?”

Kei pointed to the grove of trees, the same one he and Yamaguchi dyed their hair in and the same one he had seen kids falling down from 7 years ago. “We’ve been there before. You remember, right?” 

“Oh yeahhh!” Yamaguchi touched his hair, a reflex reaction from the reminder. “That place was really pretty. You should tell your mom about that picnic thing.”

Kei nodded. “Yeah, I’ve wanted to go for ages. Maybe we can stop by this weekend or sometime.”

“This weekend?” A smile danced on Yamaguchi’s face. “Am I invited?” he teased. 

Kei shoved him slightly. The two of them snorted. “Even if I don’t invite you, you’ll sneak in anyways.”

Yamaguchi giggled. “Anything for your mom’s onigiri.” Yamaguchi’s face softened, as if he was imagining Kei’s mom’s onigiri right now. 

Kei rolled his eyes. “Bring your mom. She’s my favorite in your family.”

“Hey! Well, you’re my least favorite Tsukishima."

“ _ I’m _ my least favorite Tsukishima.” 

Yamaguchi frowned and the two of them walked the road in silence. Kei fiddled with the headphones around his neck, not sure whether to put them on or not. Since walks with Yamaguchi had become less painful, he found it easier to carry a conversation with him than to just plug in his 5 year old headphones and listen to music. 

The two eventually stopped by the grocery store down the road, and Kei tapped Yamaguchi’s arm to get his attention. 

“I’m just gonna grab some stuff for my mom. You can go ahead without me.”

Yamaguchi nodded and gave Kei a small wave before heading back down the road. 

It took Kei maybe 15 minutes to gather a few groceries and check them out. He walked down the road, swinging the bags and humming to himself. Kei never really allowed himself to let loose in front of others before. He much preferred to act stoically, he wouldn’t be caught dead humming in front of his teammates. Yamaguchi wasn’t like that. Sure, he was polite and shy, but he never tried to hide himself away. Kei noted that Yamaguchi was a lot braver than he gave credit for. He filed that thought to the back of his head.

The sky was starting to turn grey. Rain was drizzling softly on the ground. Still, children climbing the sycamore trees in the park screamed and jumped down as they ran away to find shelter. From this section of the forest where Kei was walking, Kei could see the kids running away from the trees and finding shelter under their mother’s coats, coats that they threw over their children to save them from the water. Kei didn’t understand it. The sycamore trees were large and all encompassing, they provided plenty of protection from the rain on their own. The kids were honestly better off staying there. 

The mothers hugged their children tightly as they ran from the rain. Kei walked on. 

Kei turned a corner, and a sense of déjà vu passed over him. 

Yamaguchi was pressed up against a wall, looking far too uncomfortable as three kids in their class surrounded him. One of them made an unintelligible yet scathing remark, and Yamaguchi flinched. Kei saw white. 

He started bolting towards them, when he stopped in his tracks. 

Yamaguchi had reared back a fist, and punched the boy square in the nose. 

The boy doubled over, and Kei could finally get a good look at Yamaguchi’s face. It wasn’t nervousness Kei had seen before. The expression Kei saw now was unrecognizable on Yamaguchi’s face. 

It was unfiltered rage. 

Yamaguchi punched the boy again, and kicked him away, landing a firm shoe on his stomach. The boy swung back and Yamaguchi narrowly dodged. The boy ended up grazing Yamaguchi’s cheek instead of his nose. Yamaguchi stumbled back, dodging another punch. This time, it hit him in the corner of his eye. Yamaguchi cursed loudly, and kicked the boy away. He doubled over on the road. Yamaguchi moved to punch the rest of them when Kei felt his legs work again. He ran up to them, grabbed Yamaguchi’s arm, and pulled him back. Kei turned around to face the three boys surrounding them. Rain was starting to wash blood off their cheeks, and they all looked completely terrified.

Kei was used to people being scared of him. They had been scared of him since he was a kid. But this feeling, the feeling of them staring in horror at the timid, freckled boy he was holding back, was entirely foreign. Kei realized that he must be some kind of twisted savior to the three, saving them from getting beaten up by someone who was seemingly ready to murder them. 

It was more than they deserved, for sure. 

“Get. The Fuck. Away From Here,” Kei enunciated. The boys nodded sharply and ran away. Kei watched them run until they were out of eyeshot, then let go of Yamaguchi’s arm. Yamaguchi yanked his arm back and rubbed his wrist, like he was on fire. “What was up with th-”

“What the hell were you thinking? Why did you hold me back?”

Kei gaped at him. 

“Why did I- What do you mean, ‘What the hell was I thinking?’ What the hell were  _ you  _ thinking! You were acting insane! You were either going to kill them or get killed yourself.” Kei spat. 

Yamaguchi scoffed at him. “So? Why the fuck do you care? We aren’t friends, Tsukki!” Kei flinched. “And we aren’t eight years old! I don’t need you to walk me home everyday! I don’t need you to protect me from bullies! And you sure as HELL don’t need to hold me back from  _ shit. _ ”

Kei felt blood rush straight to his ears. The rain started to pick up speed, and was drenching the two boys. Kei could barely hear the drumming of the raindrops over the screaming match the two were having. “Well, obviously not. You seem to be handling your bullies very well nowadays, aren’t you? I’m sure your mom will be THRILLED so see you show up home with a bloody nose! But hey! At least you got to beat up a few stupid kids-”

“For fucks sake, Tsukishima! They weren’t my bullies!” Yamaguchi screeched. He ran his fingers through his wet, matted hair, and looked at Kei with… Kei couldn’t tell. Anger? Sadness? Pity? “They were yours.”

The rain seemed to fall slower around Kei. The incessant, loud patter had deafened around him, only the ringing in his ears was audible now. His glasses were catching water which made it difficult to see, but he could feel that Yamaguchi was staring at him with an unbridled look of anger and disbelief. Water had drenched Yamaguchi’s hair and made it lie completely flat and frizzy. It framed his face in water droplets. His clothes hung from and stuck to his skin. Kei could only imagine he looked just as much a mess. If not more. 

“What?” Kei finally breathed out. 

Yamaguchi laughed nervously. “Yeah.” He reached up and wiped water away from his face. “Just because people think you’re a scary asshole doesn’t mean they don’t say stuff. They were being homophobic. Called you, both of us but mostly you, some bad shit. They asked me why I was hanging out with you if you were  _ gay _ . So I-”

“So you punched them.” Kei’s voices barely rose above a whisper. He took his glasses off and wiped the droplets off, looking up at Yamaguchi with wide eyes. He could see a little clearer, but the world was still blurry. Kei blinked a little to focus his eyes. Yamaguchi stood too close to him. Kei could see the raindrops on his eyelashes. 

Yamaguchi punched them. Kei couldn’t find anything in him to care about the boys at all. He was well aware that just because he was gay, people would hate him for no reason. It was something his mom had talked over with him. Kei could still remember her low, concerned voice. The way she sounded like she was walking on broken glass. Kei knew that his mother loved him very much, no matter what. In fact. she ended up loving him so much, her stomach twisted at the thought of anyone hating her son. Kei almost laughed when she said that. Instead, he assured her that he would never take it personally. It was never going to be his problem what other people thought. His mom had smiled at that, and ruffled his hair with a small remark about her “cynical son.” She also told him that even if someone did bother him for it, Kei had so many people who would stand with him. He had so many people that loved him. Kei just waved it off as “supportive mom talk.”

Yamaguchi had  _ punched them. _ He punched them and kicked them and possibly broke their nose. He got a bust lip, cheek, and eye because he  _ punched them.  _

“You didn’t have to do that for me,” Kei murmured. “You don’t have to fight my battles for me.”

“Oh, like you’ve never done the same?” 

They were silent, the rain around them was too loud. They stared at each other, panting loudly as the awkwardness and tension grew. Grew taller than the sycamore trees where Kei found Yamaguchi the first time. Taller than Kei could reach. Branches spiraled out of control, and Kei was stuck in the middle of the growth.

“I still think that was a stupid thing to do.” 

Kei fell. 

Yamaguchi glared at him. “Yeah. I know you do. You always think the stuff I do is stupid.” 

The tension grew taller. The rain fell harder. 

Kei cleared his throat. “Let’s go home. I’ll find some bandages for your face or hands or something.”

“I don’t need you to patch me up, Tsukishima. I can get home and do it myself.”

Kei nodded slowly. “Okay, then.”

“Okay.”

They looked to the ground and went their separate ways. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If you guys can think of better ways I can give warnings for the homophobia mentions in this chapter, please lmk idk what I'm doing. And whoops, I haven't updated in over two weeks! I have finals prep and had a weird moment in between where I really wanted to just. Delete everything I've ever written. But we're past that now wooo

**Author's Note:**

> Follow me on [Twitter](https://twitter.com/WlNTERSMAFUYU)


End file.
